The human brain experiences unmet emotional needs in the same way it experiences unmet physical needs – with a rising sense of panic that our very safety is threatened. Evolutionarily speaking this makes sense; unmet emotional needs signal our separation from others, which is a huge threat to our ability to survive a hostile physicalContinue reading “Emotional safety and boundaries”
Author Archives: thisonetoocanberra
Enemies (near and far) of connection
In Buddhist practice, near and far enemies are qualities or states which impede the divine qualities of the heart. Far enemies are a simply the opposite of each divine quality. Near enemies are a little tricker. While they appear similar to the divine qualities, they actually work to undermine them and drive disconnection. Here areContinue reading “Enemies (near and far) of connection”
The Unconsciousness Series – more healing through art and mindfulness
Ten years ago I attended an event where Australian musician Ben Lee encouraged us to ‘make our own medicine’. I attempted to do just that, by creating The Consciousness Series – 25 original photographs representing my significant values and experiences. As it turns out, it worked. Intentionally making my own medicine has been an integralContinue reading “The Unconsciousness Series – more healing through art and mindfulness”
Mindful self-compassion and backdraft
As discussed previously, mindful self-compassion (MSC) is the art of being your own good friend especially during times of pain, loss and frustration. This doesn’t come easily to many; as well as being a learned behaviour, self-recrimination and denial form part of our survival instincts – we dare not do anything to lose the acceptanceContinue reading “Mindful self-compassion and backdraft”
Love languages – which one(s) do you speak?
Have you ever noticed that slight disconnect that comes from having unmet needs? You know; that feeling of receiving a gift or a compliment from someone when what you really want is to spend quality time with them? If the gift or compliment, no matter how sincerely offered, is just not hitting the spot, itContinue reading “Love languages – which one(s) do you speak?”
The evolving self
My new role as parent has given me the opportunity to think about my son’s social, psychological and emotional development as he grows. Of the many theories of psycho-social development, I think Erik Erikson’s resonates with me the most. This theory suggests that during each of its eight stages, an individual is faced with aContinue reading “The evolving self”
Cultivating equanimity
Equanimity is one of four divine qualities of the heart (traditionally known as brahma-viharas) taught in Buddhist practice, along with loving kindness, compassion and appreciative joy. The four brahma-viharas represent the most beautiful and hopeful aspects of our human nature. They are mindfulness practices that protect the mind from falling into habitual patterns of reactivity which belie our bestContinue reading “Cultivating equanimity”
Sympathy, empathy, compassion (oh my!)
Sympathy. Empathy. Compassion. While difficult to untangle at first, these concepts are actually quite different to each other, if one is willing to examine them a little more closely. Shame and connection researcher Brené Brown discusses the difference between sympathy and empathy in this short animated video. In short, sympathy is acknowledging and/or feeling sorry about another’s difficult experience, but with someContinue reading “Sympathy, empathy, compassion (oh my!)”
The great cognition imposition
Humans are highly susceptible to error, and the mind – our strongest tool – is quite often the architect. To my way of thinking, this is not in spite of the mind’s strength, but rather because of it. Our minds are capable of tricking us into believing many things are rational and, therefore, a true representationContinue reading “The great cognition imposition”
The Consciousness Series – healing through art and mindfulness
Though he doesn’t know it, Australian musician Ben Lee inspired this series. In July 2013 I attended an event hosted by the Conscious Club, an organisation that promotes mindful and authentic living. In addition to performing some of his music, Ben shared his experience of living more consciously. He urged us to ‘make our ownContinue reading “The Consciousness Series – healing through art and mindfulness”
This One Too 